I’m sick

Sick and tired of seeing all these motivational pictures, posts, ads, etc… EVERYWHERE. Stuff like:

Exercise more, eat healthier, do more, work more, play more, think this way, do things that way!

It’s infecting my facebook feed, my wordpress reader, my short tv existence after work and worst of all, it’s creeping into broad fucking daylight. Urgh, cringe!

I feel like I’m being bombarded constantly by big egos telling me how to live. Are they trying to help others or are they rubbing their psychological cocks and vajayjays a little more? I don’t know, probably a bit of both. If it’s the former, I’m not sure how effective it really is.

Sure, I can work and play more and it will probably lead to good things in the future. However, seeing this stuff over and over makes me feel like I’m not doing enough.

Possible outcomes:

  • I’ll work more and play more. My future self will reflect at times and think; “Damn! I do feel better, look at where I am, all this money, all these bitches!” However, will I ever reach contentment and satisfaction? At the end of the road, burnout, depression and loneliness seem more likely.
  • I start feeling sick, sick of what my life has become; “There’s so much more I can be doing right now. It’s time to work harder and play more! Argh, why am I not doing all these things like I’m supposed to? Why can’t I live life like all those other people? Bah, my life is always the same shit everyday and I’m sick of it. I hate myself so fucking much!” 

Now I admit, I am being a bit gloomy and extreme right now. I’m not denying it never helps anyone. All I’m trying to do is tell people it can have the total opposite effect on some individuals. Seeing all this happy-go-lucky stuff is annoying, I’ve seen it a million times before. It makes depression a bigger taboo than it needs to be and nine times out of ten, it’s just not interesting…

P.S.: Big up for the people telling how they really feel on social media.
P.S.2.: The photo ain’t really that fitting but Goddamn!! haha
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Pure magic

The strangest thing happened to me today!

As you may or may not know, I’ve been pushing my mind a bit lately. Remember, everything’s connected. What’s the closest thing on earth connected to the mind? The body. I haven’t been sleeping or barely sleeping a little more than a week. My body shows. Monday I was hurting bad, headaches, trouble breathing, slime EVERYWHERE!

I had to fix this, wanting to eat something healthy, I ate pasta pesto. I felt like I needed the protein and oil to soak up all the bad shizzle inside of me. It kind of worked, but not that efficiently because Tuesday i felt even worse. I started drinking tea like a maniac, lemon, pink (balancing for women lol) but mostly green tea. I bought bread, pears and avocados (I read somewhere all green foods are best). Oh yeah, before you go to sleep, 2 glasses of RED! wine are ideal. No more, no less. I managed to get some sleep this night.

The strangest thing happened this morning. I open a text from my girlfriend, dating from last night! 2 hours after she had gone to bed. It said:

“De kruidenpot waarschuwde hem ook mens. x”

“The herb pot (kettle?) warned him human. x”

I texted back; “wtf was that message?”. She had NO recollection of it AT ALL!

I was stunned. I had to find out what this could mean! So I started thinking. So the spices/herbs are telling/warning me I’m human. Bummer, just as I started thinking I was God again. Stupid spices. Haha.

Herbs, spices. What have I been doing lately? Yeah, drinking tea (has a lot of herbs) like a maniac because I’m sick and trying to get my body to feel well again. Apparently I’ve been doing something wrong. I couldn’t figure out what. Whatever…

I got up, ate some protein with a lot of herbs and sat myself before my good old friend, mr. MacBook. I’ll tell you what I did until I found the revelation;

Blogs => FaceBook => some funny videos => FaceBook => Justin Timberlake videos because of a friend’s post => checked out that friends blog => for some reason searched what her first name means etymologically => for some reason checked out my name and my girls etymological name.

For the longest time I thought the name of my partner meant flower, apparently I was wrong. We have the same etymological descent! Our name means laurel or bay leaf (laurierblad). I looked up the use of bay leaves. It’s medicinal use: “It works antiseptic on the airways (lungs) and helps against the flu”, exactly what I need right now!

5 minutes later I was standing above a boiling pot of water filled with bay leaves, a little olive oil and salt and inhaled that shit as deeply as I could hahahahahahaha. Made a tea of that aswell, it was yummy, got a little high too!

What I have learned today so far:

  1. Everything DOES happen for a reason (see text message)
  2. Everything IS connected (see text message)
  3. My girlfriend is a witch!
  4. I love bay leaves
  5. Life is funny

Bayleef from Pokémon (bay leaf).

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